Eggshell Green

Dear TV Companies

Dear TV companies (yes I’m talking to you TVNZ, TV3, Sky etc.)

Can you please stop playing your advertisements so much louder than the shows they’re interrupting?

I normally don’t mind ads, but there are those that are so loud they make my baby sitr and me change channels straight away. Or I mute them. And I’m not the only one either.

If your ads weren’t so annoyingly loud, you wouldn’t lose your audience and the ads would be much more effective.

Thanks for listening – or should that be “THANKS FOR LISTENING!!”.

Tags: letter, television

Stuff I Luff

• Abby settling herself to sleep. No more carrying her around to get her to sleep!
• Having eight hours of uninterrupted sleep again.
• Smoked fish. Particularly good in a green salad with blanched green beans and a simple herby sour cream and lemon dressing.
• Ice cream in a cone for a simple dessert. I’m loving vanilla ice cream at the moment.
• Forgetting to hang out the washing then hearing the neighbours curse as their washing gets wet in the rain – mwahahaha!
• Market Kitchen. That show has so many scrumptious and really do-able recipes. Just tried their Pan-fried Chicken Livers with Pears and it was yum. I’m going to try and turn that into a pâté. (And doesn’t Tom Parker Bowles look just like his mother Camilla?? He just needs a wig, lipstick and a few decades on him and he too could be bedding Charles – *shiver*)

Is it Tom, or Camilla? I dunno!

Tags: television

Shortline Street: Multiple Choice

This week on Shortline Street: Alice knows which one she rather prefers.

Tags: coffee, comic, shortland street, Shortline Street, television

The Foolery Four #06

Vietnamese Puta and Gangsta sort out their priorities

Tags: Foolery Four, shortland street, television

Glad It’s Not Me

This evening I switched the channel over and a show called Another 101 Things Removed from the Human Body was on.

The current “thing” was a tumour the size of a head. Next there was a hernia that caused a woman’s stomach to hang over her knees as it carried her intestines. She had about 100 pounds of flappy flabby stuff removed once the surgeons had put her guts back in. Then a story about rectal foreign objects like a bowling pin and a light bulb … and a mention of 17 coffee stirrers in a man’s penis…

I only tuned in at the very end of this show but then found the complete show on spikedhumor.com.

If you have 43 minutes to spare and a strong stomach (or a blinking stomach like the boy that swallowed a blinky toy) it’s worth a watch.

Tags: documentary, television

Shortline Street: Tickled Pink

This week on Shortline Street: Scotty and Shanti are tickled pink over being new homeowners.

Tags: comic, shortland street, Shortline Street, television

Shortline Street: Muffled Mumblings

This week on Shortline Street: Brooke can’t understand Harry. Noone can.

Tags: comic, shortland street, Shortline Street, television

Shortline Street: The Repo Man Visits

The following is the first of my “Shortline Street” cartoons.

If you’re from New Zealand you will know what I’m taking the piss out of. If not, then let me sum it up for you – Shortland Street is a long-time running hospital soap that many locals think is rubbish. But let’s face it – it’s ours and it’s the best we’ve got!

Even though it’s full of terrible actors (some of which become known outside of the show and even outside of New Zealand, like Temuera Morrison) it fills a large hole in our creative broadcasting that isn’t reality TV, DIY types. I do enjoy those types of programmes but I also want some trash that I can laugh, cry and cringe at.

It’s something that I find myself growing addicted to, but even if I miss six weeks of it while overseas, it’s easy enough to catch up on – praise be! (I missed it tonight to create this cartoon.)

If you need to know more visit TVNZ’s official Shortland Street site. You can also watch episodes online, in case you’re one of the unfortunate nations that don’t screen this legendary show (or if you just can’t pull yourself away from the marvellous John Campbell on the other channel).

Without further ado… this week on Shortline Street, the repo man pays a visit and questions are raised.

Tags: comic, shortland street, Shortline Street, television